Make that three months of battling Life the Bitch .
Hohoho .

Dear Life ,

You are being such a bitch to me .
You are trying to rob me of my sanity .
You rob me of sleep , personal time , blogging time and a thousand other things that I love .
You are trying to wear me out , tear me down with all the challenges that you are throwing at me .
You are trying to stand in the way of my goals .


Well guess what ?
After two whole gruesome months of battling you ,
I`m still holding on . I`m still alive and kicking , I'm still not giving up .

And you will never beat me .
NEVER .

Because I am me and I always will be .

Defeat ?
What defeat ?

Sorry , no such word in my dictionary .

- - - * - - -

Meanwhile , meet my new friend of the month :
Manu Rao



He is so cool that he wears sunglasses at night ! :D




He parades around with this cowboy hat ! :D




He calls her Gloria ! :D




And this is his awesome file ! :D  (inside joke)



And here are my pretty pretty eyes for the whole wide world to see .


wheeeeeeeeeeeeee


Wanna see magic ?


Taaaa dah !
Now you can stop asking me why I use make-up to cover them up right bitches ?
=D


Life .
Its just one damned thing after another .



Treasure the people in your life .
Spend more time with them before you start losing them .. or before they start losing you .

Cause thats what it feels like right now .

I am up to my neck in assignments, projects, tests, quizzes and midterms.

I already have lecturers and co-workers breathing down my neck,
so i really don`t need my own friends to breathe down my neck as well.

And if you are the NEXT PERSON to ask me "NICOLE WHY DIDN`T YOU GO BACK FOR RAYA HOLS?"
I am going to bite your head off .
I am SO SICK of that stupid question .


More later.
Am in school library finishing off my bloody accounts homework.

- - - - - - - - * - - - - - - - -


Ah forget it .
My anger kinda died off ady ..

But seriously .
Accusations . No other word for it .



1. I don`t reply SMSes .

First of all , I am broke .
That is why I don`t reply SMSes . Even if I do , not immediately , cause most probably I needa go reload before I can reply you .

Secondly .
This sem , I am really SO BUSY that I don`t even have time to blog about how busy I am (unlike the last 2 semesters) .
Once I neglect my blog , you should have an idea of how stressful my life is .
Because I love blogging .


I don`t even have time to talk to my own parents anymore .
Everytime my dad calls me I am in college - either in the middle of a meeting , or in the middle of a discussion , or in the middle of a meeting , or in the middle of a discussion . Its damn sad okay ?

And sometimes I even get frantic calls/texts from my parents because I forget to reply them for days .

So please .
You are lucky if I even remember to reply your texts/messages AT ALL .
SO DON`T COMPLAIN ABOUT ME REPLYING THEM LATE , GOD DAMMIT .
Be honoured .

If you sms me about random things , please don`t be surprised if I don`t reply .
Nowadays i only reply if I need to (Facebook doesn`t count btw) .
So yeah .



2. You find it annoying that I always say that I have things to do .

Well what do you expect me to do ? Lie ?
You think that I don`t wanna go out when you ask me out ?
Which sane person will pick slaving over going out with their friends ?
I seriously don`t understand why some people hold grudges against me because of this .

And just in case you are thinking: She always says that she is busy busy busy but what exactly is she busy about ? All talk no action .

Oh yeah ?
THIS MONTH (SEPTEMBER) , I have done/achieved/have yet to do:

1. Daphne's Birthday Surprise (which is a major success if I say so myself)
2. Be_ADP's Social Responsibility Campaign launch (signed document with AUAM - American Universities Alumni Malaysia , and even the Prime Minister of Malaysia's secretarial department was present )
3. Work for Fiesta Econo-Mania (an upcoming carnival event which is for charity - to fight AIDS )
4. Taylor's Business Plan Competition (got into semi-finals . It is not easy . I`m damn proud of my team mates and myself okay ? )
5. Three midterm exams ( bloody accounting . DAMMIT )
6. Faisal Cup for Harvest School ( kinda like Sports Day for underprivileged children . I`m working as a volunteer . )
7. Miraz Club's Halloween Celebration ( Halloween is kinda big in ADP )
8. Be_ADP's Halloween Booths ( to be planned )
9. Presentation at AUAM's Dinner ( to be attended by the Deputy Prime Minister of Malaysia )
10. The Actuarial Science Talk ( as an Activity Director , organized a talk about all you need to know about Actuarial Science )
11. Chemistry Project ( Tin Poisoning . Wtf . )
 
and I don`t even wanna go on anymore .

How many of you are rotting at home every night , wasting your time and life ?
How many of you nod your head in agreement everytime you hear people talk about the environment , underprivileged children and all that ... but never actually MOVE YOUR ASS to help make a change in this world ?
How many of you dream of being rich and whatever , but never actually bother to work hard and reach out to all the key people that will give you a push along the way ?

Because guess what ?
I am doing exactly that .
And nothing - I repeat , nothing will stop me .

All those blog posts about my thoughts about this world . . . you think I posted it for fun , like 99% of bloggers ? All posting about global issues and shit , but never actually taking any actions ?
I mean it when I say that I want to help heal this world .
I mean it when I say that I want to be one of the most successful actuaries ever .
I never take my eyes off my goals .

I know that most of you can`t be bothered . Typical humans . I`m fine with that .
I`m not saying that I think I am superior just because I do all these things .
But before you judge me , take a good look at yourself first .
And then decide whether I allocate my time better , or you allocate your time better .



3. I am ditching my friends , esp hometown peeps .
4. I don`t care about my family .

Sound familar to some of you ?

And the bloody million dollar question of the week is: HOW COME NICOLE DIDN`T GO BACK TO SARAWAK FOR RAYA HOLIDAYS ?

I`ll bloody tell you why .
ONE . The tickets to and fro aren`t exactly cheap , because I didn`t book them earlier this year (which others did) .
TWO . ADP-ians only get three BLOODY days of raya holidays , unlike all the A-lvls or SAM people .
THREE . ONE+TWO = Its not worth it for me to go back to Kuching for this Raya hols . Simple math .
FOUR . Its not my problem if you think that I should have done otherwise . I did discuss with my parents before making my decision . Therefore it was a mutual agreement , which leads to the fact that I do care about what my family wants .

Look at it this way .

If I had gone back for those short three days , I would have spent most of my time with my family anyway .

So if they are okay with it , WHO ARE THE REST OF YOU TO JUDGE ?
Bunch of judgemental idiots .


5. I only care about work that involves ME . 

Well , I can think of no arguements to this except . . . why wouldn`t I ?
And I think that alone is good enough .
What , do you expect me to help you with your calculus when my accounting is dying ? Help you out with your report when I have an appointment ?


Honestly .
I need about 50 hours a day .
Sometimes , I even need to remind myself to BREATHE .
I am constantly being chased by lecturers and co-workers to submit my work .
So I really , really need all my friends to be understanding right now .

Please understand if I don`t have time for you right now .
I am , quite frankly , the busiest I have been in my whole entire life .